Don’t Worry. Be Happy

YES. The rumors are true.

We are back and ready for some more “kumbaya time” this week. The six elements of wellness I gave an overview of in my previous post? We are going to break each one down one by one – really get in there, dig in and get to know them. Like I said in my overview post, focusing on the full picture of wellness (ALL SIX PARTS) is what is going to make you a well-rounded athlete and person. Isn’t that what we all want?

First up on the agenda?

EMOTIONAL WELLNESS. **Cue Whitney Houston’s “So Emotional” . OK, you’re right. We’re not equipped to handle Whitney’s emotion (RIP), but you get the point.

Why do we care about emotional wellness?

As long as you’re in physically good shape and your horse is healthy…that’s all that really matters, right?  Well I don’t know about you, but I think there’s more to it. If I have a work or family crisis going on and I don’t have the ability to deal with the emotion that comes from the tough stuff life throws at me– I’m really going to struggle focusing on anything but my stress and problems.  And if I’m not focused, I’m not going to be at my best. The CTS team wants to give you ALL the tools you need to be your best. 

So what does it mean to have emotional wellness?

So glad you asked! If you’re “emotionally well” you have the ability to do a few different things…

• You are able to express a wide range of feelings (joy, sadness, fear, disgust – you know…all the characters from Inside Out) and you can also accept a wide range of feelings from others.

• You participate in solid relationships based on trust and R-E-S-P-E-C-T tell me what you mean to me. (Whitney and Aretha references in the same blog!?! How did we get so lucky?)

• You understand what your limitations are; however, you also are confident in your unique abilities.

• You can cope with stress. (I know this one is not always easy with the demands of work, relationships, riding, finances – just life, man)

• You’re able to take responsibility for your actions.

• You have an enthusiastic and optimistic approach to life.

How are we doing so far?

If you’re not checking all of the above boxes how do we get there? Another key of emotional wellness is ongoing self-examination.  You want to take regular inventory of the above, and if you’re not hitting the marks then start on the below list. 

1. Be positive about yourself and your life. This is something that can be hard, so it’s ok to work at it.  This tip might sound cheesy, but hang in there with me.  Every morning when you meditate (or you could say it to yourself in the mirror while you get ready or write it in a journal)  go through a list of things you do well, things you like about yourself and things that you’re grateful for. You may not believe it at first but keep going. 

2. Be satisfied with your performance. Now this may correlate directly to riding/competing for you, or maybe it’s work or school. If you missed my blog on Goal Setting – go back and read it. Having a plan, setting a goal and then evaluating can help to take some of the emotion out of the post-competition evaluation. You’ll know what you wanted to happen, what didn’t happen exactly the way you expected, and how you can put measures in place to try and keep it from happening again.  Feeling more in control can help in feeling satisfied vs. frustrated or disappointed.

3. Work to effectively cope with life’s ups and downs. This is where outside help may come into play for you, and there is NO SHAME in that game. Sometimes stress and life is too much to handle all on your own.  Using an app or talking to a therapist and counselor are great tools.

4. Be non-judgmental in your approach to others. If you’re nit-picking at others – there’s a good chance you’re also doing that to yourself.  Everyone has a lot going on, and we all need a little grace.  Give it to others and give it to yourself.  You’ll be giving all of us (that includes YOU) a much-needed break.

5. Own your mistakes and learn from them. This will serve you well in every area of your life. If you can do this in your relationships, at work, at school or at the farm you will be better for it. A couple years ago at work I made a (really big) mistake. It happens!  I could have gone to my boss and tried to cover it up or displace the blame, but I didn’t.  I owned up to my mistake, told my boss what I learned (always, always, always triple check the “recipient” line of important emails) and guess what?  Not only did I not get in trouble – I actually got brownie points. I promise – it will serve you well AND help your emotional wellness. Double bonus.

6. Say “no” without feeling guilty. Have you ever been excited when you agree to do something then the plans fall through? Happens to me all the time.  I have a serious case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), and I hate the thought of really anything happening without me there.  I’m the life of any gathering, OK!? But because of my FOMO affliction sometimes I say “yes” to things which I have no business saying “yes”. It is OK to miss things in order to rest, relax, and regroup.

7. LAUGH. Laugh loud and try to do it as much as possible. It relaxes you, triggers the release of endorphins, boosts the immune system, protects the heart, burns calories and may even help you live longer. What are you waiting for? Make a dinner date with your funniest friend, watch your favorite funny movie or go to a comedy show. Best. Homework. Ever. (You’re welcome)

Are you still feeling stressed?

Take a mental break, put the phone down, get a massage, read a book, write down some of your thoughts in a journal, go to the gym, meet someone for coffee, bake something, listen to music – you get the idea. 

Tending to your emotional wellness is IMPORTANT and NECESSARY. If the above list isn’t working check out apps like Mood Kit, Mind Shift, TalkSpace Online Therapy, Happify, Mood Tools, Headspace, Calm or Ten Percent Happier.  There’s a ton of great tools out there – find one that’s best for you.

And if you need to talk with a counselor or therapist in person?  Do it! I’ve done it, and I’m better for it. Moral of this long story?  Take care of you. 

Resource: http://www.clark.edu/tlc/healthy-penguin/wellness-dimensions.php

Our team at CST wants to help you be the best, well-rounded version of yourself.

If you’re not officially in the CST family yet – shoot us an email and we can start helping you establish goals, develop your wellness habits and be the best rider you can be. Now let’s get after it!